On January 23rd, after many tests, CT scans, an MRI and 2 surgical procedures, I have been diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer. To say the last three weeks have been a whirlwind is an understatement. It's not something you ever expect or want to hear and to be honest, I am still processing things. Emotionally there have been many ups and downs and physically it has been quite the undertaking. Below is how things started and I will try and post updates regularly so you can follow along on my journey..... On Christmas day, I notice my eyes looked yellow and after that my skin began to yellow dramatically. I went to the ER after my doctor office called and told me that my liver numbers, ALT and AST were way over the norm. They should be in the 40's and they were in the low to mid 600's, indicating my liver was not functioning properly. The ER did some tests, an ultrasound and CT scan and did not see anything at that time that stood out. They eliminated Hepatitis B and C as well as other things. Originally I thought it was exposure to Hepatitis A, because my lab result came back that there was an antibody for that but I found out later all that meant was that I had been exposed to it at some point in the past and am now immune to it. On January 18th, I decided to go back to the ER because my symptoms had only been getting worse (the itching caused by bilirubin/bile back up was horrendous!) They decided to admit me to see what was going on since it had been three weeks with no answers. After another CT scan and then an MRI, they found some kind of blockage in my bile duct. I was told that Monday, the 20th, the surgeon would do an endoscopy (scope down my throat) to see if they could remove the blockage. They were unable to remove anything but the doctor was able to take 7 biopsy samples of the blockage. After meeting with the docs after that procedure, they told me that they would go in the next day (the 21st) through my liver and attempt to put some stints in to allow the bile to flow again and give me some relief from the build up, itching, discomfort. The placed one stint and a tube coming out my upper abdomen that drains the bile into a bag to provide some relief. Unfortunately, after both procedures I had some kind of a reaction that made me have tremors and uncontrollable shaking as well as some back and chest pain after the 2nd. Lots more tests ran and fortunately my heart and other tests came back okay. On January 23rd, the hospitalist came into the room and sat down with me and explained that the biopsies came back and I have pancreatic cancer. Those two words are ones I never thought I would hear. Based on my experience with other people I have known with this diagnosis, I immediately jumped to wondering how much time I have left. I have children and grandchildren! Thinking that I may not have much time left hit me like a ton of bricks and was very hard to process. The doctor told me to promise not to look at google and let me find things out as they progressed with the doctors, so that's what I did. Believe me, its hard not to look this stuff up, especially with what I already knew but in order to remain having any kind of positive outlook, I had to just deal with things day to day and not look up worst case scenarios. I was released that day after begging the doc to send me home - it had been a roller coaster of 6 days and all I wanted at that point was my own home, my dog, my bed..... I was scheduled to meet with Oncology on January 28th. Met my doctor, whom I like very much. She ordered more labs for me and after leaving I got a message that I needed to report back to the hospital immediately to go back to in patient. My sodium and potassium had tanked and kidney function was not good. To be honest, I hadn't been eating or drinking well and after being sick for a month with not much relief I was extremely weak and not thinking clearly at all. I spent another three days in the hospital getting fluids, potassium supplements and being watched closely for heart issues due to the potassium levels. I bounced back fairly quickly and they told me I could go home as long as I drank at least 3 gatorades a day to keep my electrolytes up and stay hydrated. We had planned a trip to Florida with some friends that was supposed to be from Jan 29th to Feb 5th. I told them to go ahead without us not knowing what to expect still being in the hospital that day. Fortunately, I did bounce back and was feeling more like myself when they let me out on the 30th. Lucas and I talked and decided it might be good for me before dealing head on with the diagnoses, treatment, etc and waiting until Feb 6th for the PET scan that would tell us how bad it was to take off to Florida and take advantage of the sunshine and a break with friends as a distraction and get some much needed sunshine and exercise. While it was hard physically to get around, mentally it was just the medicine I needed at that time. I was able to get some exercise (nice weather!) and gain some weight (I had lost 15 lbs in a week and a half) and strength back in the few days we were gone and I am so glad I got the opportunity to go. The love and support that has already been flowing in is incredible and I feel so blessed to have so many amazing people in my life. I know this will come as a surprise to some of you, as I haven't been able to reach out to a lot of people that I wanted to. I have just been too overwhelmed and tired to do a whole lot lately other than doc appts, which is why I wanted to get this page up and running so I can keep everyone posted as things progress. I will post other updates (PET scan, treatment, etc) in the updates tabs so everyone can keep informed as things progress. I love each and every one of you that has touched my life and can't say enough how much I appreciate the support as we go through this difficult journey. Love, Rachel